Apr 25, 2018
Rob and Tami answer a few of the most common questions that come up frequently. Topics covered include how to know if you or your partner is an addict, porn addiction, catching your male partner looking at male porn and who to reach out to if you need support.
TAKEAWAYS:
[5:36] How do you know if you or your partner are an addict?
Addiction is not defined by how much and what kind, but if your involvement with this behavior affects the functioning of your life. The consequences of an addict’s behavior causes distraction and turmoil and is a driving force in their life.
[9:01] For the partner that may suspect they are in a relationship with an addict - trust what you feel, trust what you see, and don’t stop at no.
[12:41] Finding out hints about a sexual partner’s life doesn’t mean they are a sexual addict, but it may mean they have something they feel ashamed or fearful to share with you.
[13:25] I found my husband or boyfriend looking at male porn or have had sex with men. Is this a threat to our marriage, and will he leave me for a man? This does not automatically mean he will leave you for a man, or that he is homosexual. The first step is having an open conversation, letting him know what you found / saw, and asking him directly what it means to him.
[19:04] Who can I talk to or trust with my questions around sex, love and addiction? Is it even important for me to talk to someone? Partners should not underestimate the importance of having a supportive friend, confidant or professional to trust. There are several partner support options, including reaching out to a CSAT, or Certified Sex Addiction Therapist, APSATS, CoDa, and Al-Anon.
[25:08] We learn and grow best with problems that are similar to us.
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