Jan 30, 2020
Porn is not only a guy’s issue. Women struggle with porn addiction, but you never hear about it. In fact, one in three visitors to adult websites is women! So why is there such silence for women looking for recovery resources? Alice Taylor overcame her addiction to porn by finding healthier, non-sexual, ways to have her needs met. She is the author of Restored: A Woman’s Guide to Overcoming Pornography. On this week’s episode, she shares her journey of recovery and the shame that surrounded her about sexuality and porn.
TAKEAWAYS:
[2:00] What are the cultural differences between the U.S. and Australia?
[5:20] Alice grew up in a household that absolutely didn’t talk about sex or sexuality. Why is this a problem?
[6:50] Alice was 12. She was horny and she found porn on the internet.
[8:50] The best way to talk about pornography online is by having a healthy conversation about it with your children, even when they’re 4 or 7, or 14.
[10:35] When did Alice realize her porn addiction was a problem?
[12:35] Alice entered into an abusive relationship because she was a vulnerable mess desperate for intimacy.
[16:40] Alice is very thankful for therapy. She saw her therapist every two weeks for five years and it helped her process all her feelings and emotions.
[20:55] How does Alice’s husband feel about Alice’s sexually disconnected past?
[23:20] Before therapy, Alice was always afraid.
[24:00] Boys and girls get caught up in porn often for different reasons.
[27:30] Why did Alice write the book, Restored?
[30:20] If you don’t heal your deeper issues, the porn addiction will come back.
[33:30] Before Alice dated her husband, her previous sexual experiences were all bad. It was disconnected and unhealthy and Alice didn’t want to be there anymore.
[35:20] Alice wants to help other women experiencing the same thing she did realize their power and overcome any shame they might have.
RESOURCES:
The Porn Panic: Is Porn a ‘Public Health Crisis’?
Cruise Control: Understanding Sex Addiction in Gay Men
Prodependence: Moving Beyond Codependency
Email Alice: Alice@TheGraceSpot.com
Restored: A Woman's Guide to Overcoming Pornography Book by Alice Taylor
QUOTES:
- “The bible says no. Sex is for marriage. Think about it when you’re married.”
- “When you don’t introduce healthy sexuality into a child’s language, it’s either shamed or tell them it’s bad, that creates problems for them.”
- “By the time I was 18, I was a vulnerable mess desperate for intimacy, affection, loving touch.”
- “Therapy was just a huge part of healing for me because when I healed those broken places and acknowledge what my needs were, and have them met in a non-sexual, non-porn way, I had less of need to find porn.”
- “I had so much fear and PTSD. Every person to me was a threat that will hurt me.”